Strait of Malacca Bridge – A Bridge to Nowhere

Numerous non corrupt individuals commented that the Melaka –Dumai Bridge across the Straits of Melaka is a waste of money, a futile endeavour, and this is true. I will elaborate from a geo-economical standpoint.

Excerpt from the Star Online Newspaper October 16, 2013

The proposed bridge would be built by Malaysia over 48.7km of water, connecting to a mostly agricultural island of Rupat on the Indonesian side. Since the island is mostly uninhabited, the Indonesian side would have to construct a 70km highway semi circling the island to connect the bridge’s landing point with Dumai town. This highway would even need to include a minimum 5 km span bridge to cross the straits separating Sumatra from Rupat Island.

Excerpt from the Star Online Newspaper October 16, 2013

Have you noticed that when making a case for the construction project, the greedy eyed politicians or developers tend to give facts about Dumai alone, without mentioning the colossal fact that you are linking the island of Sumatra, the sixth largest island in the world and largest island in Indonesia, with mainland Asia via Malaysia. This fact is huge, but why did they leave it out? From a glance, it can bring incalculable dollars’ worth of investments and development to the Island of Sumatra. Puzzling indeed.

To understand, one must first look at Sumatra. Sumatra is home to roughly 50 million Indonesians and with land mass of over 1.5 times that of Malaysia (East and West). Sumatra is no Java. Java is Indonesia’s thriving nexus while Sumatra is an important peripheral island. Java’s contribution to Indonesia’s GDP is roughly 2 ½ that of Sumatra’s, reflecting a similar ratio between the two island’s population. Medan is in northern Sumatra is the island’s largest city with roughly 4 million residents. Palembang in the south is the second largest with 1.7 million. Sumatra is largely less developed than Java. But both these islands, account for approximately 80 percent of Indonesia's GDP.

Transportation in archipelagic Indonesia mostly revolves around sea travel via ferries and air travel via low cost airlines. It is due to this that road systems other than on the island of Java are mostly undeveloped. Take the trans-Sumatran highway for instance, it runs from north to south of the vast island but it single carriage way (one lane either direction) at parts, known to be pothole ridden, landslide prone, bumpy and at parts extremely congested. Compared to Malaysian highways, this main artery is no statelier than a federal trunk road.

From Wikipedia Commons

Driven out of necessity rather than grandiosity, ‘pemerintah’ or the Indonesian government has embarked on building the new Trans Sumatran Highway with toll booths! It roughly follows the same alignment as the old one, but this is planned to be a modern infrastructure like our North-South Expressway in Peninsular Malaysia. Expected to be completed in 2020, this would be the turning point for Sumatra on the path towards development. Most importantly, the new highway connects with Dumai directly. Perhaps very forward planning by the Indonesian government?

Excerpt from wildsingaporenews.blogspot 

Nevertheless, Indonesian builders have a notorious reputation of not completing many major infrastructure projects, especially due to financing difficulties. But one such project mooted by Indonesian President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono, now in the planning stage, is the Sunda Straits Bridge. Annually, an average of about 20 million people cross the Sunda Strait. This bridge would relieve ferry traffic from the island of Sumatra to Java and effectively connect Jakarta to Bandar Lampung in South Sumatra. Twenty nine kilometres in length this 6 lane dual carriageway bridge accommodate both road and rail traffic. This bridge is key to the Trans Sumatran Highway’s success as it funnels traffic and prosperity from Java to Indonesia’s second most important island.

In my humble opinion, the bridge across the Straits of Melaka should not be built unless the Sunda Straits Bridge and the Trans Sumatran Tolled Highway are completed and a reasonable amount of prosperity is achieved by Sumatra. Until then, if they proceeded with constructing, it will truly be the proverbial bridge to nowhere.

But when all the stars line up, connecting the far flung island of Java to mainland Asia would be poetic victory over the country's geographical fate to say the least. Building it is not a matter of if but when. Just not now, not yet.

 

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Bingeing on Fringe

I was delightfully blown away by the fifth and final season of Fringe. While the initial seasons were mapped out like X-files, monster-of-the-week format, the final and shortest season is an exciting suspenseful serial. It is more of a treat for fans of the earlier 4 seasons like me. I couldn’t stop right after the first episode and couldn’t get enough, I went on a Fringe Binge.

For those of you who don’t know about Fringe, let me explain a little. In Fringe universe, much like the X-Files universe, unusual and unexplained things seem to happen in the US, and that’s why the FBI forms a division, the Fringe Science division to investigate all the things that go bump in the night. Instead of monsters, Fringe frequently deals with some technology or other that brings out the monsters in men.

FBI agent Olivia Dunham recruits Dr. Walter Bishop from a sanitarium. He was once this great scientist who now the world thinks is mad. But Walter doesn’t go willingly, and Olivia hunts down Peter Bishop, Walters’s estranged son to persuade him as well as to legally release him from the mental institution.

Walter is one kooky scientist who insists on working from his old lab in Harvard. There he mingles with anything from candy, LSD to human blood. He keeps a cow in the lab, which he has to regularly feed and clean up after. Basically, Walter is source of scientific inspiration as well as quirky comedy.

In the early seasons, the show follows the procedural drama format, but with every episode, a continuing mystery builds and deepens. For example, the large sinister conglomerate Massive Dynamic was founded by Walter’s science partner, William Bell, before he was institutionalized. Massive Dynamic has conducted many experiments on test subject in the name of science and is the source of many fringe incidents.

A major subplot is the parallel world in which Peter was rescued from. You see, Walter’s original son died some time ago, but Walter jumped into another universe, and inadvertently stole the other Peter back to his universe. Of course all this crossing into parallel universes has its repercussions; as a result the other world experiences singularities like a black hole vortex. Soon such singularities would be formed on this side as well. To counter the singularities, the other side developed ‘Amber’. When a location is ambered, everything turns yellow and has somehow frozen in time and space, and thus preventing the singularities from destroying the place.

Now, the other side knows what Walter did. In fact, Walternate, the other side’s Walter is Secretary of Defense and is launching a war against our world. Among the soldiers are shape shifters who can take the shape, form and voice of someone they just killed. And of course Walternate has a sinister end game.

The other side is quite interesting really. There must be a point in time where they diverged from our universe. Many things are different, the have obsoleted the use of paper, forced everyone to carry IDs and just have an incredibly technologically advanced law enforcement. They still have New York’s Twin Towers because Sept 11 never happened and their statue of Liberty is bronze instead of the green rust we have on ours. Lastly, they have airships!

Another subplot is the Cortexiphan drug experiments Walter and William Bell conducted on children a long time ago. Turns out, Olivia happens to be just one of those children. The catch is that Cortexiphan can give children special abilities, like telekinesis, telepathy, power absorption and all kinds of weird. Among other powers, Olivia had developed the ability to detect and see objects from the parallel universe and well as the ability to cross over.

The third and most intriguing subplot is that of the Observers. Observers are pale, bald men who wear a full grey suits, matching fedoras and carry suitcases around with them. They show up at defining moments in history, hence, they ‘observe’ history. But one such observer took history into his own hands and changed history forever. It resulted in the survival of Peter (from the other side), whom otherwise would have drowned in a lake. The observers would be the basis of a horrible war that takes place in Season 5.

I hope I have whet your appetite for what is no doubt a very good sci-fi series. They don’t make them like these anymore. Many of them now are about a post-apocalyptic world and depict people trying to survive, so it hardly gets too philosophical nor science-y. Five delicious worthwhile seasons. Bon Appétit.

Hard Trivia Questions

Geography

1) What is the SECOND longest river in Malaysia?

A) Sungai Panjang

B) Sungai Rajang

C) Sungai Kinabatangan

D) Sungai Pahang

2) In the Klang Valley, there is no distinct dry season, but which period receives the most rainfall?

A) Northeast Monsoon (November-March)

B) Southwest Monsoon (May-September)

C) Inter-monsoon period (April & October)

D) What season? Rainfall is constant throughout

3) What is the newest country in the world (as of 2013)?

A) South Sudan

B) Timor Leste

C) Kosovo

D) Bangsamoro

4) What is the capital of Papua New Guinea?

A) Honiara

B) Port Moresby

C) Suva

D) Port Vila

5) What island is comprised of mainly Greek and Turkish populations?

A) Crete

B) Corsica

C) Malta

d) Cyprus

6) The Suez Canal links the Mediterranean Sea with which body of water?

A) Atlantic Ocean

B) Red Sea

C) Black Sea

D) Persian Gulf

7) The Spratly Islands are an archipelago located in the middle of the South China Sea and its sovereignty is disputed among several countries. Which among these are not among those countries?
A) Taiwan
B) Brunei
C) Singapore
D) Vietnam

Mortal Instruments is a Tool

I was warned that is a twilight copycat. But for three dudes who after a failed attempt at EscapeRoom, were looking for more fulfilling entertainment after being locked in for 45 futile minutes. And we chose this, just because the rating on IMDB was higher than the Purge.

What a mistake that was. Over two hours I’ll never get back. The movie which was based on a teenage girl novel series of the same name, is about a girl, Clary who find out she’s a half angel through another half angel called Jace, who is narcissistic to the core. I won’t even humour you by telling you the ridiculous names the author has come up with to label her characters. Simon, a human, is interested in Clary, but she falls in love with Jace instead. Does this love triangle seem familiars? Team Jace vs Team Simon anyone? But fret not, this love triangle soon becomes a love quadrangle when some other half angel guy takes a fancy to Jace.

The script oozes buffoonery, as you not only get half angels but vampires, werewolves, warlocks, witches, demons and everything magical that has been written in the past 100 years. And all this in the first book/movie of the series. It’s a complete mess of characters, folklore, scripting, clichés and acting. There was a moment when it even parodied borrowed a plotline from Star Wars. I detected the Luke, Leia and Han Solo love triangle, as well as “Jace I am Your FATHER’ and not forgetting the incestuous romance.

I could only conjecture that the high IMDB rating was due to the thousands of Twilight loving teen girls suffering from withdrawal syndrome. Please save your sanity and money and stay away. I have to give this 2/10.

We're the Millers

A good comedy’s battle over the audience is half won with its premise alone. That’s how the Millers slayed the theatre. I mean what can go wrong with a 30-something-yo drug dealer named David smuggling drugs from Mexico accompanied by a rented family consisting of a stripper, a runaway punk girl and a naïve dork using a rented RV as a Trojan horse? Everything. That’s why this comedy has this writer in stitches from beginning to end.

This comedy in this movie is raunchy but not exclusively raunchy. We see how this family cleans up, polish their lines, look and sound the part of an honest, no-cussing American Bible Belt family to get through customs with no questions asked. Unfortunately, they run into a Mexican drug lord and a DEA officer (Drug Enforcement Agency) and his vacationing family; the border patrol guards was the easy part.

The make-believe mother of this family is actually a stripper who live named Rose played by Jennifer Aniston. For all Jennifer fans, look forward to a striptease treat. She doesn’t look a day over 35 with those curves. (She is 44.) But in all seriousness, Jennifer played the funny bone to the right tune.

Everyone is talking about William Poulter who plays the nerdy kid, Kenny. He was that small kid in The Chronicles of Narnia 3. This upcoming star can pull off the self- confessing nerd persona as easily as singing TLC’s Waterfalls. His fake sister could casually infer him a loser, and without batting an eyelid accepts it:

“Even this loser wants fireworks”, referring to Kenny.
“Yeah”, Kenny whole heartedly supports.

Another joke goes like this:

Stripper Mom: You’re getting five hundred thousand dollars for this, and only paying me 30 thousand?
Fake Sis: I’m only getting a thousand.
Kenny: You’re getting paid?!

Look out for ‘the’ joke of the movie involving Pictionary, Kenny’s poor drawing and extremely age inappropriate guesses. What rhymes with ‘Black Hawk Down’?

I dare say this is the wittiest comedy I’ve seen from America in the last 5 years. Although it’s meant for an older crowd, deep down, it’s a family comedy; it doesn’t matter if the family’s biological or rented. 9/10

Elysium

In 2154, Elysium is a space station orbiting Earth inhabited by the Earth’s richest, while the poor inherit a dirty, over populated, ravaged surface. Los Angeles, even downtown has been relegated to a massive favela.

To deal with a weary underprivileged population, the powers that be have robotized most of the public services work staff. Every people-facing civil servant is an android whether it’s the Department of Paroles’ counter-person or the patrolling police officer. Smart enough to detect the slightest ounce of sarcasm, they will prosecute any chance they get.

People, impoverished people are still exploited to work in factories. And when they get home, only their broken down dilapidated shacks await them. There are those who are wealthier than others, naturally, but they live in fear of losing their wealth or even their lives. So they invest heavily in security to protect themselves against murderers, robbers, smugglers and outlaws in general who seem to comprise about half the population on Earth.

And as a projection of what’s to come, Los Angeles’s population has turned predominantly Hispanic. Spanish has taken the English language’s place on the tongues of most Angelenos (citizens of the city). Realization of every red-neck’s nightmare.

Matt Damon’s character Max is just a white dude, a minority now, in the almost lawless city of Los Angeles. Turning his back away from a life of crime, Max now seeks an honest living working as a technician in a factory. But in true commentary on extreme capitalism’s demerits, where profit trumps employee well-being, Max’s fate would take the wrong fork in the road.

One day, in the factory, the production line came to a halt due to a malfunction in a radioactive chamber. Max was challenged by his supervisor to enter into that chamber to unjam the chamber door from the inside. As it usually happens, the jammed door came unstuck, Max gets trapped, and the radioactive process thing continues, baking Max alive.

After being dragged out by a medical android, he was only given 5 days to live after being exposed to a lethal amount of radiation. Max, who was trying to play it straight, had been betrayed by the system, the Man, unregulated capitalism. So no more Mr. Nice Guy.

While healthcare on Earth is limited to crammed hospital wards and 21st century technology (and human doctors), in Elysium all it takes to cure cancer or perform facial reconstruction is to lie on a bed for a few minutes, and let the wonder machine diagnose and heal to perfection. Such a powerful machine is installed in every Elysium home, but none to be found on Earth.

Elysium, why is it so special? Far removed from the realities of The International Space Station currently in orbit, Elysium is paradise orbiting Earth. Elysium is a large doughnut-shaped spinning wheel modelled after the Stanford Torus. By spinning around an axle connected by 4 architectural spokes, artificial gravity could be produced allowing residents to live with near to Earth’s gravity.

If you were to cut a cross section of the wheel, you would find several stories. However, the top story is the most interesting. It resembles a curved inverted surface of the world, the world of a luxurious gated community replete with manicured lawns and wading pools. Most fascinatingly Elysium torus has a contained atmosphere which opens into space. I was looking for some kind of membrane or ‘force field’ but it doesn’t seem to be featured in the show. Because without it, there’s no possible way atmospheric pressure can be contained in Elysium.

Instead of having docking bays, spaceships can supposedly just glide right into the fake atmosphere. While Elysium seems to have been around for some time, an advanced space station such as this didn’t seem to have any predecessors i.e. Elysium 2.0, 3.0 etc.

The rich and famous of Elysium include the elected President of a United Earth, the fiendish Secretary of Defense, Mdm Delacourt played by Jodie Foster with a bad French accent (but excellent French though) and many filthy rich oligarchs whose businesses are primarily headquartered on Earth. And to ferry them back and forth, all it takes is a 20-minute ride on a one-seater shuttle craft. Earthlings are absolutely banned from entering Elysium.

After Max’s exposure to the radiation, his only hope to outlive his 5 day impending death sentence is to smuggle himself on an illicit flight to Elysium, break into a home and use that cure-all wonder machine. But before that, he has to collude with his former gang boss and have a mech suit surgically attached to his body. Gruesome stuff.

The plot thickens when he is reconciled with his old female childhood friend who is now a nurse and has a sick daughter which can only be cured on Elysium, duh. Without revealing too much, I should only say that it smells of a typical popcorn summer movie plot riddled with Swiss cheese sized holes.

Mostly unsatisfying and a major disappointment when compared to director Blomkamp’s maiden outfit in District 9. Elysium’s plot tends to over-generalize and stereotype the different characters but never giving them enough depth even Max, the protagonist. The sci-fi is also unbelievable. A do-it-all wonder machine that heals people? Does it mean that Elysium citizens are immortal? That’s a more intriguing story right there.

In this post Dark Knight Era of very artfully crafted villains, Elysium would surely have the worst antagonist ever written. Kruger was supposed to be Delacourt’s black ops agent on Earth. When he first appeared, he seemed no more imposing than an extra on the set. Slowly but surely, Kruger’s character got bigger until he became the primary villain, seizing the role from Delacourt, his former employer. It’s not like he has a great back story or anything, he just got angrier. This isn’t the way to write in a villain.

Elysium barely makes the grade, and is saved by its passable action scenes, but sci-fi wise, an outright reject. 5/10.

R.I.P.D may R.I.P.

Ryan Reynolds can’t catch a break. All his movies recently bombed somehow. RIPD is no different except that this has been touted as an odd version of Men in Black without the black man which could only mean it can only be half as good.

Ryan Reynolds plays a dirty (or just slightly smudged) cop who died at the hands of his partner. Somehow upon his death, he got recruited into an afterlife police force called Rest in Peace Department, a poor play on the abbreviation: Something. Something. PD. I don’t get it.

Anyway in that weird substitute for heaven, he meets up with an old Western sheriff, Roycephus Pulsipher played by Jeff Bridges. Together they police the living world, ridding the streets of bad spirits, but the catch is they have to be disguised so as to not mix their new job with their past lives. Jeff Bridges is disguised as a hot blonde bombshell while Ryan is perceived as an old Chinese man by the living populace.

You would think that the premise of the movie would fuel it all the way to the finish line but it doesn’t. The evil souls actually look like the aliens in MIB. Kevin Bacon’s villainous acting was plain bad. Ryan Reynolds was forgettable. The plot was altogether uninspiring with overuse of CG.
But the things that sticks out are the jokes. The show’s premise allows for the most original and hilarious comedy. One was about Jeff Bridges defending his character’s full name.

Jeff: Call me Roycephus.

Ryan: Why don’t I call you something short like Roy.

Jeff: Or Cephus.

Other than the jokes, there really isn’t much going for this movie. Bad reviews and poor marketing has scared away potential audiences. Although it feels awkward laughing alone in a nearly empty cinema, I would grace this with a 5/10.

The Mighty Cockroach

In my closet a cockroach baby lived

My vacuum licked it away come spring cleaning day

Along with spiders, their webs and dust all gray

It‘d die in the dust chamber, I hope God forgives

Three weeks later dust bunnies were gathering

My vacuum got hot for yet another purpose

But a warm acrid smell made me horribly nauseous

To my surprise the roach was alive and kicking

No longer a nymph, it’s now a full grown monster

Sealed with the vacuum litter with no food or water

The insect thrived on nothing but dirt and moisture

It will outlive us all if the world went nuclear

Behold the mighty cockroach, so what fate awaited this beast?

I emptied it out onto the grass, and stamped it with my feet!

Warm Bodies

I like zombies. I’ve been catching all the latest zombie movies, 28 days later, zombieland, “… of the Dead” original series from George A. Romero, Walking Dead TV series and even the aberrant Resident Evil. You might then find it surprising that I am quite fond of the Warm Bodies, and its peculiar genre: Teen Zombie Romantic Comedy.

Meet R. R used to be living. Now he lives out his afterlife at an airport and eats humans for sustenance. But R is not very dead. His mind is burdened with contemplations of life death and conflictions about eating people. He actually narrates the entire movie, to effective comedic result. But he has no memory of his old life. Interestingly, zombies in this movie are highly functional, probably reliving their previous jobs to the point where even zombie infested zones have limited electricity supply.

R is truly unique but not alone. He has a best friend where he has almost-conversations with. The oddest thing is R lives alone in a marooned airplane right on the runway. He needs it, of course, to keep all the junk he has been treasuring like watches, sunglasses, and a vinyl collection which he plays (with limited electricity) to lighten up the mood a little. For a person who’s dead, R is livin’ the life.

This light hearted mellow comedy doesn’t follow the regular zombie lore. For instance zombies eat brains so that they can relive the memories of those they eat. This apparently compensates for the lack of the zombies’ ability to dream. And all zombies degrade into a malicious skeletal form – sans eyes and skin – eventually, they are called boneys. But other zombie conventions hold true – they won’t die unless they have their brain damaged otherwise they’re practically superhuman. The notion of zombie apocalypses doesn’t make much sense anyway, so the authors of Warm Bodies have my blessing.

Julie, our protagonist’s romantic love interest, hails from the city, a walled territory that keeps the dead out. She was on a foraging mission out in the dead zone for medical supplies. That day she met R. R was chomping down on her Julie’s boyfriend’s brains when his once dead heart throbbed a beat at the sight of her. Th- thump. He fell in love. He starts to live.

Given the film’s premise, I dare say this is the most interesting zombie movies I’ve seen ever. We have only ever seen the beginning of the apocalypse, and never the reverse. But Warm Bodies is at the end of the day, mainly a love story. And no, it is not like Twilight. If anything, this movies romance is inspired by Romeo and Juliet. (R and Julie, get it?) Furthermore, Nicholas Hoult’s spot-on portrayal of R as the perfect zombie boyfriend lends the film legitimacy as the most original and awesome zombie cum rom-com ever. 10/10.

Jack and Oz A Tale of Two Fairy Tales

Early in March I had the pleasure of watching back-to-back weekend screenings of what I would classify as modern day fairy tale movies. ‘Jack the Giant Slayer’ came first, then ‘Oz the Great and Powerful.

Jack is a twist on the often read bedtime story Jack and the Beanstalk where the single giant is replaced with a nation of enormous scraggly humanoids known as giants. They have managed to extend the fable of a poor farmer boy into an epic glitzy medieval war between a kingdom on the ground and the one in the clouds, oh yes a princess is involved. Jack is not without its flaws but on the whole it is wholesome, logical and at times fun.

Oz on the other hand is a prequel to the classic 1939 family-oriented fantasy adventure musical ‘The Wizard of Oz’ (and the book it was based on) which has spurned many sequels and reinterpretations. In this prequel we meet Oscar the magician who journeyed to Oz in a hot air balloon during a tornado super storm. Oscar would become the bogus wizard which Dorothy travelled to meet. We also meet up with the Glinda the good witch of the north, whose goodness is all too saccharine (read artificially sweet) for me. We also witness the initiation of the green skinned Wicked Witch of the West with an alternate storyline compared with the musical ‘Wicked’.

What strikes me as odd is that while both movies have a budget of around USD200mil, Jack is languishing in the box-office, a contender for flop of the year while Oz is close enough to break even. Oz has nowhere near the heartiness like Jack has. Oz, to me came across as incredibly childish and had me wincing the moment Oscar stepped into Oz. Larger than life flowers would greet Oscar like in Alice’s Wonderland. The Munchkin tribe have all the maturity of toddler targeted Saturday morning cartoon. And the biggest kicker: James Franco plays no one other than himself. 

No one dies in Oz, so that presumably pursues an even younger target audience. Jack on the other hand has scary giants and a lot of death takes place. However the gory details are left out for good measure.

Overall, out of 10, I would give Jack a 7.5 and Oz a 3. Jack the Giant Slayer is a far better production. So if you have watched Oz and are over the age of 10 and have not watched Jack yet, you might prefer Jack over Oz.

The Sulu Sultanate And Sabah

The non-state endorsed Filipino intrusion on Sabah soil has elicited passionate response from the Malaysia nation. I’ve read many articles from both sides of Sulu Sea, both pro Malaysia and pro Philippines. Both have made their arguments, and not surprisingly, I’ve sided with the Malaysian side. Sabah is fully functioning state with sizable economic heft within the federation of Malaysia and has been that way for over 50 years. Do you really expect Malaysia to relinquish authority over Sabah for it to become a territory of the Philippines all over some questionable document signed hundreds of years ago?

You should know when you’ve been conquered. I offer this same advice to the Argentinians disputing the sovereignty of Falkland Islands. Claiming land belonging to another country politically impossible if it is populated with loyal citizens unless war is declared and victory won. Leave the conquests of the past in their rightful graves, I say, and move on.

The irony is that the predominantly Christian Philippine government is currently amidst a war of civilizations with its Muslim South but conveniently recognizes the claims of the descendants of a sultanate that the Philippine government itself abolished. Even if simply for appearance sake, that former Sulu sultanate should be elevated to head the whole Philippine state, so that their claims would be more credible. (And obviously I’m not a lawyer). Instead of another land grab, the government should focus on asserting full control over ALL of its nation.

One matter that irks me is the amateur cartographer who took the liberty of enlarging the extent of the Sulu Sultanate without regard for the realities of history. So I would like to present a picture that has been circulating around.

The Sultanate of Sulu was only established circa 1450 on the islands in the Sulu archipelago namely Jolo, Basilan and Tawi-tawi. These three island form the heartland of Sulu Empire where the Tausug peoples are associated with.

The eastern-most portion of the inaccurate map could not have covered those western parts of Mindanao Island because that would have been the territory of the powerful Maguindanao Sultanate, a rival fellow Muslim Moro kingdom. At this time Brunei’s empire covered most of northern and northeastern Borneo – including Sabah but not the interiors which remained in tribal hands – and Palawan even up to Cebu.

In second half the 17th century, a highly disputable agreement between the Sultanate of Brunei and Sulu took place which saw the Sulu gaining a bonanza purportedly as reward for helping Brunei suppress a rebellion. Their prize was North Borneo, islands like Banggi, Balambangan and Palawan and all of Brunei’s territories to the east. No documents ever existed to prove this, however since the relationship between Brunei and Sulu were on warring terms, the actual border between them is anybody’s guess. However, the Tausug people did have settlements in Eastern Sabah - Kudat, Semporna, Sandakan, Lahad Datu, Kota Kinabalu, Menggatal, Tuaran dan Telipok - and even in Eastern Kalimantan which suggests Sulu presence of some kind.

On 22 January 1878, an agreement was signed between the Sultanate of Sulu and British commercial syndicate (Alfred Dent and Baron von Overback), which stipulated that North Borneo was either ceded or leased (depending on translation used) to the British syndicate. (Wikipedia) In that treaty, the Sulu Sultan signs over assigns forever and in perpetuity all the rights to the territories from Pandasan River on the north-west coast and extending along the whole east coast as far as the Sibuku River in the south.

This is the first time since the Bruneian cessation that any demarcation of Sulu territory has been recorded. Sabah then was then known as North Borneo a British protectorate administered by the North Borneo Chartered Company. North Borneo was the amalgamation of territories appropriated from both the Brunei and Sulu Sultanates. Unlike the baseless propaganda maps from the net, I use this historical facts to draw my map. One small caveat though, I couldn’t pinpoint Sulu’s domain on the Zamboanga peninsula before it was captured by Spain, so it’s probably inaccurate.


The Tausugs were a tough bunch, after more than two centuries of Sulu resistance, the Spanish empire finally subjugated the Sulu Empire on July 2 1878 under Manila’s administration. When the Philippines was a US colony, they abolished the Sulu Sultanate upon the death of Sultan Jamalul Kiram II (1894-1936) in an attempt to create a Commonwealth of the Philippines, a precursor to the today’s Republic of the Philippines.

The former Sulu Sultanate is not unlike Kurdistan in the Middle East. The Tausug people like the Kurdish are a people divided by the deeds of European colonialists. Today they reside in separate countries and have no state to call their own. In Sabah, the Tausugs are known as Suluks but still share the same language. The huge influx of Muslim immigrants from the Philippines due primarily from unrest there in recent times comprise primarily Bajau, Tausug and Bugis peoples. They have also been involved in the notorious alleged Project IC where the Malaysian citizenships were given out in wanton in efforts to Islamize Sabah.

Sabah is more than just hectares or acres of land. Sabah is about Sabahans, the most ethnically diverse region in Malaysia. On 31 August 1963 North Borneo achieved independence but 16 days later in a UN brokered deal acceded to the Federation of Malaysia. How would you justify returning a democratically governed state to descendants of a former monarch based upon the ‘facts’ that the land used to ‘belong’ to them. The land belongs to the people, and I believe they have spoken.

Retire the 1980s Action Movie Stars

Some movie stars don’t know when to call it quits. I’m referring to the Arnolds, the Sylvesters and the Willis’s who just won’t stop making action movies. Sure they make a couple of good ones now and then, but the majority of it are shallow seen-it-before action flicks. They are guilty of playing the same characters over and over again, which is plausibly why they are called stars and not actors. Please join in my petition to put an end to such tasteless movies.

Arnold Schwarzenegger  

You came from Austria as a body builder who transitioned into acting. You never learnt accents. You peaked in the 90s with movies like Terminator 2. You became governor of the greatest and richest state in the USA. You had a fling with the help and fathered her child. Scandalous. You had a divorce. And now you want to keep making action movies?!

Sylvester Stallone 

You got swag, machismo. You never learnt how to act. Your Rocky and Rambo series in the 80s brought you great fame. You never stopped. In ‘The Expandables’ you rounded up all your former buddies and made an ensemble cast B-grade action movie. You sinned big time. And you’re doing it again with ‘Expendables 2’. You’re approaching 70 for goodness sake, stop!

Bruce Willis  

You’re the most active action star of them all. You started with the Die Hard movies but since then you’re in everything! Your most decent attempt at acting is in the Sixth Sense. I don’t mind seeing more of you, but shouldn’t you dial down on the action. Transition, transition. I’m fed up of seeing grandpas running around with guns.

Jean-Claude Van Damme , Dolph Lundgren and other miscellaneous stars 

You guys never made it very big, small potato movie stars. But you just keep on making them movies. Guys, I’m sorry to say, you missed the stardom boat. So give up your dreams and lay low. P.S. Dolph you look really OLD, dude.

Tom Cruise 

You are a Scientologist, member of a cult which worship aliens. You have had 3 wives which you split up when they each reached 33. You are arguably the hottest movie star of our time. I admit some of your movies are good: Minority Report, War of the Worlds, A Few Good Men, Jerry Maguire. But lately you don’t really act anymore, you’re on cruise control. You wear the same smug movie after movie. You choose to play the same character: the suave unbeaten hero. Yuck! You destroyed the essence of Mission Impossible and made it all about YOU, but restored it in the fourth installment.

Enough with this insanity. If enough of us join in to amplify and escalate this, the 80s action stars will realize that they no longer belong in today’s cinema. By doing so we may one day hope that the gods of Hollywood will keep the sanctity of our cinemas intact. Sign the petition now.

Lincoln

Yawnnnn. For a movie that nearly won best picture this one is clearly not deserving. I have no idea why everyone finds it so good. When a historical movie titled Lincoln comes along, I’d expect a brief lifetime introduction, highlights, civil war. Instead, what Steven Spielberg’s movie focuses on is his last few months in office. It has two focusses, one is the politics and lobbying behind the 13th amendment to the US Constitution which abolishes slavery amid the Civil War with the South, and the second is his family life.

We see Lincoln raising his young son, consoling a sorrowful wife, played by a distraught Sally field, who finds it hard to cope with the death of another son a few years ago, and Robert, the eldest son who wants to join the military at the behest of his parents.

Lincoln believed in his heart of hearts that no man should be made a slave to another, which is why he pushed so hard for the bill to pass. According to the movie, the bill is “the most liberating constitutional amendment in history had been passed by corruption, aided and abetted by the purest man in America”.

Lincoln reeks of heavy and underhanded politicking and bribing, something you might expect in today’s crafty world. There are no exciting scenes other than this politicking. No battles. Even the moment of his assassination has been omitted. This is not what I had planned to see. Mmm, I wonder if Lincoln is better in his other role, as the slayer of vampires. 2/10.

Cloud Atlas

Every cloud has a silver lining even atlassian ones, I thought when I was right in the middle of it. Surely the 6 disparate stories, separated by time, must come together in momentous finale, all the pieces fit together for an ‘Ahhhhh’ instance. Arrghh that moment never came.

If you don’t know, this movie was based on a book that has six stories set in six different eras ranging from 1850 to the 24th century. The six stories are supposedly interwoven somehow. I urge you to google the movie’s synopsis if you are interested.

Watching the movie, I was unconscionably confused as the movie flips through all six time zones building each story in tandem. That is a pretty migraine inducing exercise. I did some research, and found that the book instead has a very unusual approach to telling these six stories. The stories are nested, all except the sixth story is told in two parts. The first story is the earliest while the sixth is in some fictitious future. The stories that have two parts break at some critical point in their lives. It follows the pattern 12345654321, the story ends where it began.

In the book, the connection between six stories is that the protagonists in each story (second to sixth) were reading or watching some legacy that was created by the earlier protagonist e.g. a book, journal, music, video broadcast and motion picture. Also all protagonist bear a comet shaped birthmark. Critics mostly agree that the author insinuated that all six protagonists are reincarnations of the same soul. However this writer believes that the six stories are poorly stitched together, they lack meaningful connection and most stories by themselves aren’t very good. Hence I was duly disappointed by the lack of a grand finish.

The Wachowski’s movie on the other hand also borrows the reincarnation theme. However, their reincarnation does not follow the comet birth marked protagonists in each story. Instead the siblings chose a few actors to replay certain characters in each time zone. So the soul of Tom Hanks for instance has a story arc of its own, reincarnated from story one to six. He played the protagonist once, but in the other stories he played supporting characters as well as short cameos. Some characters were evil, some good.

This all may sound interesting but meticulously following seven characters through six stories is an exercise in futility. I’ve found a gaffe too, one character cannot be reincarnated because he has to exist twice within the same time. I’m referring to Hugh Grant’s characters in the 1970’s and the present.

The fifth story is set in Korea, with all Korean characters. Since they decided to recast the same actors in all 6 stories, they resorted to using facial prosthetics which are at times laughable, just to make Caucasians look Asian. Exhibit A, Hugo Weaving aka Mr. Smith in yellow face.




I waited till the end. It was neither meaningful nor rewarding. The connections between the six stories are flimsy. The Korean makeup was annoying. I rate this only as a 3/10, don’t waste your time, and take a rain check.

Right Time for Benedict’s Exit

Pope Benedict XVI has announced his resignation, the first resignation in 600 years, as is often said. However the papal office is unlike monarchies, it is a position, and not reign. He is a working bishop, the Bishop of Rome. The past few hundred years of history have indicated otherwise, where an ailing pope is no longer able to perform his duties lingered on the throne as his duties were taken over by others. Perhaps the best legacy this pope may leave is the practice of abdicating.

Admittedly I am not a fan of Benedict XVI. During his tenure, he promoted Gregorian chants during mass. It was to create a more solemn atmosphere but also boring compared to the uplifting evangelical churches. Unfortunately he encouraged more Latin in music, which most of the congregation find it hard to follow (they were used to English hymns).

He rewrote the entire missal for non-Latin languages, which is the instructions and texts necessary for the celebration of Mass. His intention is to bring all the vernacular language masses closer to the original Latin literation. He likes to think he’s making things holier for Catholics. In Europe he tried to fight the growing faithlessness, where atheism is a growing trend. I reckon those atheists will run further away from the church with the changes he has made, even if he is more twitter friendly.

On the more secular front, Benedict appears to me as a zealous conservative as opposed to his passive conservative predecessor. He is anti-science (opposed to embryonic stem cell research), he is a poor PR manager (the sex/rape scandals remain unresolved as many more cases get uncovered), opposed to contraception (a tool to prevent the spread of disease made out as a weapon against Christianity), cannot accept female priests etc.

Quite simply Pope Benedict is too conservative and antiquated for our times. And unfortunately since his successor will be picked out of a group of like-minded people, would likely be no different.

Cashback Credit Cards

Credit cards are the Achilles' heel of many. Like loan sharks, banks lure in prey with easy credit and enticing offers. I roll my eyes whenever I see platinum cards being approved to people earning a lot less than RM5000. Foolish young ones rack up debt which banks delighfully charge the exorbitant interest rates on.

The banks are putting ideas in heads that having credit is the same as having cash. It is not. But consider the alternative; debit cards, they have hardly the same benefits as normal credit cards and are not acceptable everywhere. Credit cards still hold the edge.

I’ve had it with banks and their credit card traps. I wish I could exploit them instead. So it heartens me that in recent years a new category of credit cards has emerged: the Cashback credit card.

Follow my lead ONLY if you can:

1. Control yourself and your spending with purse strings tighter than a monkey's nuts.
2. Calculate your expenses on a daily basis (or before and after every time you make a purchase)  
3. Pay all your bills in full and still save money month after month, for a rainy day of course

There are quite a number of cashback credit cards in the market, many trying to outcompete each other. But all, sadly, trying to make you spend more than you should and hoping you don’t pay your bills on time.

So, generally the best cashback credit cards are ones that:

1.  Don’t have many conditions e.g. minimum spent before cashback kicks in
2. Are the least complicated and sneaky which deliberately makes you spend more
3. Offer continuous cash back unconditionally, avoid those short promotional term ones
4. Cover a broad range of products and not just petrol or groceries
5.  Should have easy waiving of annual fee (and also govt. tax)

New cash back credit cards get issued every now and then. This is a good guide to get started.

For myself, I have chosen not one but three cashback credit cards each with its own scope of use. Sounds a bit much? I assure you that I have done the math (including yearly govt. tax of RM50) and factoring my current credit card usage (I’m not a heavy roller) it is sustainable.

Maybankard 2 Gold Card

• Annual fee: Lifetime fee waiver
• Minimum annual income:RM30,000
• The benefits of two cards, Maybankard 2 American Express® Card and Maybankard 2 MasterCard, in one sign up, one service tax, and one statement.
• 5x TreatsPoints for all spend on your Maybankard 2 American Express Card in Malaysia or anywhere else in the world except Government Bodies, Education Institutions and Insurance Provider.
• 2x TreatsPoints for every RM1 spend on your Maybankard 2 American Express Card at Government Bodies, Education Institutions and Insurance Providers. 1x TreatsPoints for all spend on your Maybankard 2 MasterCard/Visa Card.
• 5% Weekend cash back when spend on Maybankard 2 American Express Card.
• A cap of RM50 per customer (Principal Cardmember) per month

Comment:

The American Express card is the one with all the benefits although you get an extra credit card. As long as it is accepted, at 5x points, you get 10000 points for every RM2000. Based on Maybank’s redeemable vouchers, 10000 points can get you approximately RM50. The RM50 govt. tax can be waived with 10000 points as well. Best of all Maybank’s treatspoints never expire. That is approximate additional 2.5% cash back with a total of 7.5%. Drawbacks: Weekend Amex use only.

OCBC Titanium

• 5% Rebate on Dining
• 1% Rebate on everything else
• 5% Rebate on Groceries
• Zero Annual Fee with 12x swipes
• 5% Rebate on Petrol
• 33% Cash Back on Interest Paid
• 5% Rebate on Utility Bills
• Annual Usage Bonus – Govt. Tax offset with RM10k annual usage

Comment:

Best all-around card best used as a primary card unless they accept AMEX. Also best to be used for all bills that include Astro, telecoms and electricity bills. So if you’re paying bills like most of us, switch to this credit card instead. Only 12 swipes a year regardless of amount to offset annual fee.

RHB Evo

• 20% Cash Back* on selected Amusement & Entertainment MCC categories (ie. cinemas, ticketing agencies, bowling alleys, commercial sports, tourist attractions, amusement parks, karaoke centers and much more)
• 2x Reward Points for all E-commerce transaction and RHB Now bill payment
• Card annual fee waived with minimum of 12 swipes per annum
• Maximum cash back is RM50 per month, per customer. No RHB Reward Points awarded for transactions entitled for Cash Back.

Comment:

No kidding, it really is 20% for any establishment that matches their merchant code category. It works for me as I watch quite a lot of movies and go for the occasional karaoke. For that rebate to be maximized fully, your expenditure can’t exceed RM250 a month.

I know what you may be thinking. Three cards, so many, when to use what. It’s not easy, I won’t lie. But saving money isn’t easy. So I've made a flowchart to help decide which card to use and when. I’m gracious enough to share it with you so thank me.

  

Chinese New Year and Not Lunar New Year

In Malaysia, the Spring Festival (春节) is known as Chinese New Year. This is correct. However there is a growing number of Malaysians calling the Chinese New Year solely as the Lunar New Year. I will soon explain why this is incorrect culturally and terminologically.

First all varieties of calendars can be categorised as solar, lunar and lunisolar calendars.

Solar calendars are calendars that annotate with dates pertaining to the Earth’s rotation around the Sun. They have months that only approximate the moon’s cycle which means the moon does not factor in at all. Examples: Gregorian calendar (the one everyone is using)

Pure Lunar calendars on the other hand based its months precisely on the moon’s cycle. An actual year in a pure lunar calendar is eleven days short of an Earth Year. The famous example is the Islamic calendar where they don’t even bother to sync with the solar year.

Most calendars are in fact Lunisolar. Months reflect the lunar cycle but a leap month is added to synchronise with the solar year. Since the moon cycle really only affects the tides and werewolves, people have less need to know about the moon cycle than say the solar cycle which marks when the seasons like joyous spring and dreadful winter will arrive. The Chinese Lunar calendar is one of many examples, but today it is used more to calculate holidays, festivals and fengshui.

In the Malaysian context, there are other lunar calendars like the Islamic calendar and Tamil (and other Indian subcontinent) calendars. It would be unfair to refer to the Chinese New Year as the Lunar New Year because it may cause ambiguity as to which calendar you are actually referring to. Unless you’re speaking in Chinese which would then make sense. Otherwise just stick to Chinese New Year.

Happy Chinese New Year.

Second Dubai Report

Well it’s about time. I’d thought I would return to Dubai a lot earlier. It has been over a year since my last visit, which was pretty much a stopover. But in November 2012, another chance to visit Dubai surfaced because the Arabs want another demo, but this time I will conduct more fact finding and requirement gathering. Euphoria aside, just as the deal was nearly clinched middle of January, HQ pulled the plug on my poor some-saw-it-coming project. Had I known of this gloomy outcome, I’d be a little less excited.

So this marked the second and possibly last trip I would make to Dubai. This time I had 3 things to look forward to. One, I was travelling alone, which also meant performing the demo alone, a big step I might say. Two, my trip would be for five days, four nights, so it’s unlike the short layover like last time. And three, A380 baby! I skillfully scheduled myself aboard the A380 from KL to Dubai.

You can’t go wrong with Emirates. But apparently economy class is all the same, A380 or not. I thought there would be lounges, bunk beds, and bars but apparently they were reserved only for business and first class passengers. Passengers travelling coach get the usual cattle herd treatment. To be fair A380 economy class seats are probably an inch wider. And the aisles a couple inches wider or something. Hooray for economy.

Dubai in autumn is a much better place. The air is a lot drier, and temperatures lower than the summer. This time I got to see more of coastal Dubai, the thin strip of land fronting the sea and the manmade ginormous palm island which also cradles the development boom that Dubai is so well known for. From far in the desert inland, the coast is marked by a jagged wall of gleaming pinnacles all arranged along the coastal Sheikh Zayed Road.

I didn’t get much time in the day to visit Dubai’s tourist spots, I was either in the company’s Dubai office or the location is the desert where the client was. My excursions were mostly limited to the night. My hotel was located in Dubai Media City, one of the many ‘city’ developments that are actually industry specific free zones intended to suck in foreign investments like a straw.

There is one observation, or rather fact I’d like to point out. Dubai is not friendly to the budget traveler. Every tourism project is catered to the extremely wealthy. Every taxi I saw was a Toyota Camry. 7 star beach resort hotels mushroom out of every corner. The only place that could be considered cheap is downtown where Dubai’s older character can be uncovered. Old Dubai is kind of like Kuala Lumpur’s Chow Kit with the occasional museum here and there.

In Dubai’s old town, there are Arabian bazaars called souks bearing informal names like Textile souk, Old souk, Gold souk and Spice souk. With the exception of the gold souk which is basically a road full of jewelry shops, the other souks carries that griminess and character that we associate with third world market places. The souks are a great place to visit at night especially in summer when temperatures are intolerable.

Other attractions accessible at night are of course the malls. I visited Dubai mall before (at the base of Burj Khalifah) and I did it again but this time round I managed to visit the aquarium within. Another mall I visited was the Mall of the Emirates, which is the one with the artificial ski slope, SkiDubai.

Also not-to-be-missed is the tacky Ibn Battuta mall which has themed districts like Sunway Pyramid. The mall designers got their inspiration from the travels of Ibn Battuta, a Muslim Moroccan explorer in the fourteenth century. So they distinctly separated the mall into Andalusia (Muslim Spain), Tunisia, Egypt, Persia, India and China zones. What’s impressive is that they have a whole Chinese junk in the Ming dynasty courtyard.

None of these places, I could visit conveniently without the Dubai metro, which is a God send considering the vast expanse of Dubai and that the major thoroughfares although very wide are chock-a-block with traffic at peak hours. As of 2012 there are only two lines, the red line (52km) which follows the coast and connects the airport and the green line (22km) that horseshoes around the airport and Old Dubai. The architecture of the stations is impressive to say the least. Its futuristic curved golden shell like roof wraps the station in air conditioned comfort against the harsh Dubai heat and occasional sandstorm.

If I had time during the day, I would love to have visited Atlantis on Palm Jumeirah, possibly a waterpark, the Dubai creek, maybe take an abra or boat across the creek and definitely museums. But I made good on the time I had. Dubai is definitely a manufactured tourist attraction, but the catch is that it is specifically targeted at high net worth individuals and not the average salaried tourists. Places such as Burj al-Arab are exclusive to guests and are strictly off limits.

Our office in Dubai got downsized from the last time I was there. There are only 5 people supporting an office in charge of the whole Middle East region and bearing in mind the nature of our business, it does not suffice. Anyway I made friends with whoever was there. Altogether three Arabs and two Indians but none of the Arabs were local Emirati, but all three spoke French. It’s always interesting the things that a resident can share with you.

For example, there are many churches in Dubai but only one Hindu temple although there are 1.7 million Indians in Dubai, 85% of the expatriate population are of Indian descent. There are zero Buddhist temples. The churches probably cater to European and Filipino residents. If we compare to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia where Islam is also the predominant religion, we would see a startling difference. The ratio of Hindu temples to the Hindu population is highest among the minority religions. New churches in Peninsular Malaysia on the other hand find it hard to get official approval and have to resort to setting up at shoplots or industrial plots. So there exist divergences of thinking in the Malays, who are more afraid of Christianity, in comparison to the Arabs who find Hinduism too pagan to allow for Indian migrants to practice their religion freely. Generally Arab Muslims regard Christians and Jews as “People of the Book” who basically believe in their same monotheistic God. Food for thought indeed!

 

Dubai is quite Americanized. Little known American fast food franchises, GM pickup trucks, right down to pavement design all contribute to the American inclination. However one aspect is absent, the rigid grid like road layout is sorely missing in Dubai. Despite my Dubai colleagues being longtime residents of Dubai city, I proved my geographical skills once again when I helped them navigate the maze of roads while using GPS. They were of course lost while I’m just a tourist. Score!

And so concludes my second and possibly final report on Dubai. Dubai is an incredible place. Construction is at full swing again, the 2008 financial meltdown was merely a speed bump in Dubai’s race for world domination. A country whose local inhabitants are outnumbered 4 to 1. A country where business is good, tax does not exist and life’s a beach. A monarchial country which, compared to its immediate neighbours, is open and tolerant. Dubai I wish you the best in your future projects and whatever form you may take.

 

 

 

 

Propecia and Me

I’ve been losing some hair gradually over the past 10 years. My affected region is the crown, or the top of my head. So with a doctor’s prescription I tried Propecia, or finasteride. I took 1mg of finasteride everyday (almost) for six months. I am well aware of its most conspicuous side effects which include impotence, abnormal sexual function, gynecomastia (male boobs) and other sexual symptoms.

So after subjecting myself to a self guinea pig test, I’d like to report the following symptoms. I did not experience any side effects of the sexual nature. However:

• More hair grew on my crown region
• My scalp was less itchy and less oily
•  No untoward side effect seen until 4th month, where I experienced unusual random muscle twitches and slight muscle pains all over my body. I also experienced pains in my ribcage, leading me to believe I had chest pains
•  Fatigue. I find myself sleeping a lot more than I’m used to. I got tired easily at the end of the day.
•  I did not gain any muscle although I worked my ass off at gym

After the six months I decided to stop treatment. My muscle pains and twitches and fatigue went away. Muscle mass noticeably increased after stopping Propecia, although diet and workout regimen had not changed. No despite what reports indicated, my hair did not immediately fall out. I wouldn’t take Propecia again for more than 3 months in duration given the side effects I encountered.

Merlin

The story of Merlin and King Arthur has been told countless times, sometimes together sometimes apart. But I was drawn to this BBC produced television series, a fantasy reimagining of a classic legend, from the first season or series as they call it in the UK.

It is only after the finale aired that I realised great it really was. I initially liked it because of its youthfulness, humour and the magic. But the producers had more adult undertones for just an ordinary children's programme. Over five seasons, I noticed a solid story progression ticking off all the major milestones of Arthurian legend. It bears more likeness to a miniseries rather than an aimlessly wandering fantasy TV drama hoping for a season renewal with a great pilot but no end in sight.

There are a few running themes in this series, among them are the chemistry between Merlin and Arthur, the elevation of Guinevere from servant girl to queen and associated unlikely fairy-tale romance, the prohibition of magic in Camelot, Morgana’s transition from nice to naughty and last but not least the whole magic-old religion-destiny enigma. But it's really the finale that shows you what Merlin is really about. Finale spoilers later.

True, Merlin follows a formula almost every episode. Something magical happens, Merlin sweeps in and saves the kingdom, despite the fact that his efforts go unrecognised. That is what makes it fun, and it meets the returning fans’ expectations. Merlin’s motivation? To fulfil his destiny as told by a great dragon, to be by Arthur’s side, fighting to uniting the kingdoms of Albion (old name for Britain) and returning magic to the land.

But first, a story arc summary of all the five seasons of Merlin

Season 1

Merlin, a young warlock is sent to Camelot under the charge of court physician, Gaius. Gaius becomes mentor to Merlin not only in medicine but also in witchcraft, as Gaius has dabbled with it in the past. Camelot is under the reign of King Uther Pendragon, a tyrant ruler who has outlawed magic and would execute anyone who has it or practises it, so Merlin practises it in secret.

Merlin meets a caged dragon who tells him that it’s his destiny to protect and serve the king’s son, Prince Arthur Pendragon. Merlin soon becomes Arthur’s personal man-servant who becomes a little too personal as we see the beginnings of a budding bromance.

The Lady Morgana is under Uther’s guardianship, and lo and behold her personal servant is the not too attractive Guinevere or Gwen for short. Lancelot arrives in Camelot and has the hots for Gwen. We find that the lady Morgana has the power of premonition through her dreams which Gaius tries to ‘treat’. Morgana showed signs of rebellion against the king’s punitive measures against magical persons. It was triggered when Uther tried to kill a small druid boy called Mordred.

The main magical villain this season is Nimueh, a high priestess of the Old Religion. The Old Religion is what they call all the magic we see on screen. Nimueh was involved in King Uther’s past which is related to Arthur’s birth itself. Merlin ultimately defeats Nimueh but the lives of Arthur and Gaius were put at risk.

The common consensus is that Uther is over zealous and irrational when it comes to magic. Sorcery is not evil but instead good or evil lies in the heart of the practitioner. Gaius believes that Merlin is the only one who return magic to Camelot.

Season 2

While Gwen reveals that she has feelings for both Lancelot and Arthur. The season’s main villain is Morgause, another high priestess of the Old Religion who has a serious grudge against Uther. Morgause approached Morgana, befriending her, and slowly turning her against the King. In the end Morgause kidnaps Morgana, leading Uther to launch a nationwide search.

Merlin releases the caged dragon, but it takes revenge on its former captors in Camelot. Merlin becomes a dragonlord, with the ability to summon, command and kill dragons in order to save Camelot. And finally Merlin falls in love for the first time, but she dies and becomes The Lady of the Lake.

Season 3

After a year of being missing, Morgana is now in league with Morgause and lays siege to Camelot. However Uther prevails in the battle but was duped into thinking that Morgana’s loyalties are still with him. She has fooled all but Merlin (and Gaius) so they are ever vigilant of her every move. Also Morgana learns that she is really the King’s illegitimate daughter, which would give her rights to the throne. And she conveys all of this to Morgause which she secretly sees from time to time.

At the end of the season, Morgana manages to overthrow King Uther with an army of immortal dead, locks him in the dungeon and takes the crown for herself with Morgause at her side. But her reign would be short lived as Arthur heads the knights and forms the legendary Round Table. Lancelot one of the few people who know of Merlin’s wizardry, becomes a knight under Arthur though he is not of noble blood. Arthur then retakes Camelot but Morgana and Morgause managed to flee.

Season 4

A year since the end of last season, Uther is ill and depressed about Morgana betrayal. Morgause dies leaving Morgana as the ultimate magical baddie. Arthur is governing Camelot on behalf of his father with the assistance and council of his maternal uncle, Agravaine. But unbeknownst to all, Agravaine is secretly colluding with Morgana.

After much magical plotting and scheming, Morgana manages to kill Uther. Prince Arthur becomes King but still takes advice from Agravaine.

Morgana learns a prophecy that Emrys is both her destiny and her doom. Emrys is the Merlin’s magical name that only a select few people like druids know, but not Morgana. So Morgana tries hard to discover and destroy this mysterious Emrys.

At season’s end, Morgana conspires with a warlord and the mole Agravaine to conquer Camelot castle and installs her as Queen for the second time. The Sword in the Stone scene is re-enacted and with that, Arthur confidently leads the guerrilla attack on their sieged castle. Arthur reclaims Camelot, and takes Guinevere to be his queen in the grandest ceremony Camelot has ever seen.

Season 5

An unspecified number of years have passed by since end of last season. During that time, Camelot experienced its golden age. The defeated Morgana however faced imprisonment with a baby dragon at the hands of some foreign king. But she rose to power eventually, becoming a dark queen herself.

The once druid boy, Mordred showed up early in the season, but now as Arthur’s saviour and ally. He soon joins the other knights at his famed Round Table. But Merlin receives a prophecy that Arthur will die at the hands of Mordred after an underhanded betrayal, so Merlin remains distrustful of Mordred throughout.

There is a subplot where Morgana captured Gwen and psyched her into an extreme case of Stockholm syndrome, forcing Gwen to be her double agent. But that problem was resolved with Merlin’s help.

But then, as it was foretold, Mordred turned against Arthur when his childhood crush, a druid girl was sentenced to death by Arthur. Mordred went running to Morgana and revealed secrets about Merlin and Camelot. They soon joined forces and launched an attack on Camelot with the aid of Saxon kingdoms.

Finale Spoiler and Review

For what may have begun as a children’s series certainly has a very dark ending. As each season passes, villains become unyielding in their viciousness, and the consequences of actions become graver. But in the end, there is no happily ever after ending, but left us with a James Dean ending, a star struck down in his prime. I guess that makes the best legends, when the young die, they live forever.

I thought Merlin was about magic. How Merlin discovered his powers, but after the he became dragon lord, the magic was same old same old. I hardly even mentioned any magical story arcs in my summary of the seasons above because it was pretty much inconsequential. How about a long drawn out war between two magical adversaries, Merlin and Morgana. No, Morgana didn’t even know who Merlin really was until near the series end. Others thought it was the forbidden love between the African servant and King. But their marriage was over and done with in Season 4. And, if Merlin is the really about King Arthur, they would name the series Arthur, wouldn’t they?

The finale sets the story straight. Like most prophecies in Merlin, they usually come true. Merlin kills Morgana as foretold. Mordred did hurt Arthur in the final battle at Camlann. But he didn’t die straight away, Merlin was to take him to Avalon where a possible cure may be found. All this runs according to standard Arthurian legend.

The final episode wasn’t epic like it’s penultimate one. It was a very intimate duologue between Merlin and Arthur on his way to Avalon, during which Merlin finally reveals himself as a sorcerer, practising outlawed magic right under his nose. Arthur felt betrayed but ultimately sees the hidden hand of Merlin throughout the years. They arrived at Avalon, but it was too late Arthur had passed on. The dragon then told Merlin “This is not the end. Arthur will rise again when Albion needs him most.” Where was that unified Kingdom of Albion the dragon promised? Are the magical peoples truly been liberated at the time of Arthurs passing? No.

And then we see the last scene of Merlin in modern times. Old and haggard but very much alive. Thousands of years later, still waiting to serve Arthur during his second coming. So that’s what’s Merlin’s about. It is the story of destiny, friendship, loyalty and unending love – not the romantic but the ‘bromantic’ kind. In one episode alone, we see Arthur having to come to terms with Merlin’s years of ‘betrayal’ and Merlin coming to terms (or not if you see it the other way) with Arthurs death, a destiny unfulfilled.

The Adventures of Merlin to me represents one of the best fantasy story arcs on TV ever. And no other series can ever have a finale so tragic, so predetermined and so afflictive as the story of Merlin and Arthur. A fitting end to a truly magical series.